Be You
by derpette-Waffle
Summary: Phan decides to be each other for Halloween, and whoever plays their boyfriend the best is the winner!


**A/N:** So this fic is based off a post I made on Tumblr. This chapter was actually the first part of what was going to be Chapter 1, but since it was getting too long that will now be in two parts. x

This first two chapters also take place yesterday. I have plans for the Phanniversary chapter

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For the third time that night, Dan found himself staring up into the blackness. His bed felt cold despite the usually sufficient blankets, and as hard as he tried –as honestly tired as he was- he just couldn't sleep. This had been a rough week, and posting admittedly depressing things on Twitter only vented the emptiness so much. "Fuck my life…" he groaned, rolling over and pressing his face down into the pillow.

It always took Dan at least three days to remember just how boring things were without Phil around. Whenever he'd leave for holiday, Dan never really thought too much of it. Sure, he'd know he'd be alone for a week or so, but that would just mean a few nights of hugging a pillow in his place. This time, Dan was taken aback when he'd only heard about the trip so close to the departure, and wouldn't leave his browsing position to say goodbye. They said goodbye, of course, with a hug and a sweet kiss, but he'd made Phil come to him for it. 'I'm sorry for being a twat,' he texted him the next day, when he finally accepted that he'd been more in the wrong. Within minutes he'd received a reply: 'That's alright. Miss you already. :)'

That was the second day Phil was gone, and the days since had only gotten worse for Dan. He'd be scrolling through Tumblr for longer than usual, and find something funny or interesting, and go to call Phil into the room to see it, only to realize that he wasn't there. He couldn't be bothered to go out with friends, as lonely as he was getting, and ate alone every night. It usually involved some sort of takeout or leftovers; he grew to hate cooking alone, and he really didn't care what he ate. Nights were the worst –he couldn't make himself go to bed where his boyfriend continued to be absent and couldn't be wrapped up in Dan's arms. Spooning had to be his favorite position –for sleeping, anyway.

Turning back over and curling up slightly, Dan cringed at the idea that he was maybe getting too clingy. He wasn't always like this, but Phil being away indefinitely coupled with a flare in his permanent state of existential crisis was taking its toll. It certainly didn't help that it was getting really late now, and Phil still hasn't called him like he was supposed to. He was almost glad he couldn't sleep now; he didn't want to miss his call. Or worse, not know if he doesn't call.

Dan checked his phone for the time –it was already nearly three in the morning. Until a few hours ago, he'd been mindlessly refreshing Tumblr, but he was suddenly so drained that he found himself suddenly lying in the dark in a too cold, too empty bed. He wished he could stay up later, but he'd hardly slept at all all week, and was running low on stamina.

Dan was in the middle of considering strangling Phil over the phone when he did call, because he had to still stay up despite his brain nagging him to sleep, because his heart was telling him that he would call, and to wait just a little longer.

Dan's laptop screen lit up at his desk, and he groaned, dragging his near naked self out of bed to go see what the trouble was. He scratched his head as he moved sluggishly across the rug, hair curling again and sticking out in random tufts. He'd forgotten something that had to do with the screen not coming back on when it was open and hibernating, whatever the reason. His phone was left abandoned on the bedside table.

He plopped heavily into the chair and checked out what was going on. He'd gotten a Skype video call request from… Phil. Dan had to smile. Well, his boyfriend was alive and well, clearly, so he couldn't promise there wouldn't be any going off on him for waiting so long.

Phil's bright face lit up the screen –Florida had again done nothing for his pale complexion. Dan covered his mouth slightly; Phil was all ready for bed, it seemed, in a plain t-shirt with wet messy hair and his glasses back on. He'd brought his Totoro with him this time, and the top of gray plush's head could be seen low in the frame. He waved, smiling, and Dan waved back.

"About time you show up."

"Really, no 'I miss you'? Or maybe a 'hi, how's your holiday going?'" He was feigning hurt, and Dan wasn't giving up quite yet.

"Have you forgotten how much later it is here than over there?" He scratched at his head again, wincing wearily. He really was tired still, but this was at least worth staying up for.

"I know, I'm sorry I didn't call sooner! I really just got back and the first thing I was going to do was call you, but then realized I would much rather see you instead; you and your hobbit hair." Dan tried to flatten out his hair as much as he could. Phil just laughed. "So, how are things back home?"

"I think there's an indent in the sofa where my butt's been all week. It's so boring over here." He wasn't going to tell Phil how much he really missed him, and he honestly wasn't sure why.

Phil's face broke out into a grin that came up to sparkle in his eyes. "Aww, someone misses me!"

Dan didn't deny it; he knew he'd never be able to make it the least bit convincing. He bit his lip and paused for a long moment. "Of course I miss you, you muffin. No more trips without me."

"I'll gladly take you on a couple's retreat, if you want." His smile was so bright that Dan felt his face getting hot. He tried frantically to hide it.

"One day, yeah," he replied hastily. "Promise." The vagueness of it didn't seem to deter his boyfriend on the screen, and he had to change the subject before the webcam picked up Dan's blush. "So, how's Florida? I see you're now a slightly darker shade of albino. Have you been out in the sun at all or have you been hiding away in a cave since you left?"

"It's really great. I've been out to the beach a few times –I think I'm actually still covered in sand." He looked down over himself, setting the stuffed creature aside to examine. Dan did his own examining, as well.

"Haven't started any fires, have you?"

"No, I haven't! I'm not likely to, either. Did you turn your flat iron off?"

Dan was about to brush it off when he realized that no, he hadn't. He looked across the room to see that it was still plugged in, but off. No fires tonight. He turned back to Phil. "Yes, I did," he answered, proud as if he had a reason to be.

Phil smiled; he knew better. "Alright, then. Anyway, I got some candy and roasted marshmallows tonight." He held up a plastic baggie with what looked like some colorful paper packets and wads of mushy white stuff. "These are for you. I'm keeping them in the fridge until I get back."

Dan let out a short laugh. He was going to be getting old roasted marshmallows, hooray. This was a gesture of affection, though, even if Phil was nowhere near dumb enough to actually believe that they would still be good by the time he returned. It was just cute. "Lovely. Almost makes up for having to do the show by myself."

"I came how I could." He paused. "Have you gotten out at all since I left?"

"I hung out with Chris and PJ for a bit on the third day you were gone, but it wasn't really the same. Otherwise, no; unless I was working, I've just been on the internet and ordering junk food."

"We have food in the fridge, I made sure it was stocked up before I left."

"I know, but I'm lazy."

"Go and do something tomorrow, alright? You have friends, Dan –plenty of them. I'm sure at least half are just as bored as you are and waiting around for someone to call them up and want to hang out. There's your chance."

"I know I have friends, but Tumblr needs my lurking."

"I will call PJ in the morning and assure that he and Chris drag you out to have the most fun of your life!" He tried to sound serious but his bright smile betrayed him. This had easily become another round of familiar banter.

Dan pouted a little bit, only half-jokingly. "But no one puts up with my sulking like you do."

Phil's smile softened into another kind, one that Dan knew meant more adoration than amusement. "I know, you spoon. I love you."

Dan smiled softly back at him. "I love you, too."

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**A/N:** I hope you liked it so far! I'm almost done with the second chapter, so submit reviews - _xx Litsy Kalyptica_


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